Tom Tucker: Because of an accident at the Quahog Cable Company all television transmission will be out for an undetermined amount of time. Of course, no one can see this news program so it doesn't really matter what we say. I'm the Lord Jesus Christ. Think I'll go get drunk and beat up some midgets. How about you Diane?
Diane Simmons: Well, Tom, I just plain don't like black people.
Technician: You guys, we're still on in Boston.

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